OK blokes, Crazy Mummas gunna help you out! They say don’t try to understand us, just love us… but sometimes it’s just not enough… so…

Its all in the tone, take your ques from the TONE of her voice.

If a woman says ‘do what you want’ or ‘I’m FINE’ angrily or during a heated discussion. Don’t under any circumstances DO WHAT YOU WANT and SHE AIN’T FINE.

  • Stand Still.
  • Don’t move.
  • Try not to even blink, let alone sniff or lick you lips.
  • Breathe quietly and slow, actually don’t breathe.
  • Be still and look sad for your own safety.

Once she looks a bit calmer try to defuse the situation… she can blow again so tread carefully.

  • DON’T SAY calm down! That will cause her to blow… BOOM
  • DON’T SAY chill out! Saying these words in the worlds history of arguments has ever made her chill out NO she’ll blow up way worse BOOOOM

And you getting tourettesy and swearing at her, also not helpful. You’ll have a Hiroshima size blow up on your hands.

Start with… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you, I can tell I’ve hurt your feelings and that’s the last thing I want to do. I don’t want to fight with you… wait… just wait, she should self calm.

If nice stuff doesn’t work, throw chocolate at her feet and retreat like the American Troops retreated in Vietnam, she and you made need SPACE and time. Some battles you both can’t win, at times you just have to agree to disagree and compromise (such a grown up word that). It still means you are THE MAN, a clever man just making life easier for yourself. Pick your battles; some shit is not worth the fuss. Remember doing little jobs like hanging out washing, helping kids do homework, cooking tea will make her so much more agreeable when you want to do stuff… to her… with her… and with mates!

It’s 50/50

Love Suz xox