I learnt this from my boxing coach Mr Filipo Sana.
‘I forgot my wraps Filipo’ ‘not my problem Suz, I taught you to come prepared’
‘I can’t run in these boxing boots and I haven’t brought my sneakers Filipo’ ‘not my problem Suz, I taught you to come prepared, don’t make your problem my problem, I’m not owning that’.
We take on other peoples problems, in work and life unnecessarily:
- Our kids
- Our work mates
- Our friends
- Our jobs, especially as a supervisor or boss, people like to offload responsibility, its easier than fixing the problem themselves
Its frustrating when we have given the plan or the tools to succeed already. Like at staff training or family rules. So I will use this now not my problem you sort it out at home and work. I guess its human nature, easier to pass the problem on… try to make it some one else’s. If this happens; mirror image that problem right back at them… reflect. It could be the grenade theory, say not my problem.
If the kids aren’t prepared for the cross country at school, haven’t bothered to find their sneakers and gear until the morning, last minute before school its not your problem mum. So let them face the consequences of running in bare feet, let them feel the ripple effect of how being under-prepared affects them and those around them. Poor performance running, prickles and cold feet. Less house points for their team in school sports for poor performance. Hopefully they’ll be more prepared next time. The Johnson kids understand that every decision in life they make has a consequence and a ripple effect. More adults need to take this on board. Be responsible for your own shit!
A good parent an effective manager and supervisor gives the team the tools to do a good job and the respect to trust they will, the training, the inductions, the manuals, the resources and the communication. But a good manager doesn’t do other peoples jobs for them. They also don’t own others slack behaviors or responsibility and job avoidance. Use the mirror and grenade theory, chuck it back, leave them to deal with it not my problem its your job, you sort it, accept the consequences and ripple effects.
NOT MY PROBLEM… DEAL WITH YOUR OWN SHIT!